121. Incentives and sanctions for children
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This may help bring out the best in them. You can leverage incentives and sanctions for good and bad behaviour. Where they go wrong, you can apply wisdom in correcting them. The use of force or violence could have negative repercussions sooner or later. Being too soft, may also not help achieve the desired effect. The right balance needs to be applied for any success to be achieved. Learn and apply best practice. You should get better with time.
122. Signposts for more information
Do relevant searches:
- Paperbacks
- Ebooks
- Social media platforms
- Podcasts
- YouTube
- Online forums
- Blogs
- Marriage counsellors
- Etc.
123. Relevant Social media platforms
Do relevant searches. Use keywords such as:
- Marriage
- Marriage counselling
- Marital guidance
- Why marriages succeed
- Why marriages fail
- Best practices for marriage
- And so on.
124. Research and Development
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You could research the internet, paperbacks, Social media, television, radio, podcasts, interviews, 1-1’s, group sessions, etc.
125. Sources and platforms to meet potential spouses
Where can I meet my potential spouse?
- At work
- In academic institutions
- In social gatherings
- In professional engagements
- In religious gatherings
- Via introductions
- Via referrals
- Via online platforms
- Via family or friends
- In public spaces
- Apps
- Etc.
126. What attracts you to a potential spouse?
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- Physical looks?
- Character?
- Mannerisms?
- Spirituality?
- Intellect?
- Culinary skills?
- Good role model?
- Domesticated?
- Wealth?
- Fame?
- Street wise?
- Heritage
- Lineage
- Etc
127. Marriage and Success
128. Does marriage guarantee a good life?
In my opinion, marriage is full of compromise. It demands sacrifice. It involves pain, sorrow, happiness, sanctions and rewards. It has potentials for great rewards but there’s no pain without gain. Spouses with the best of credentials could fail at marriage. Others with rough pasts could be successful at marriage. Marriage is a body of experience on its own. There are no 100% right answers, but there may be guidance and experience. Ordinarily, in theory, marriage should guarantee a good, successful and fulfilled life but there are so many factors involved. I don’t think that marriage necessarily guarantees a good life, it however has the potential to do so.
129. Should I target a perfect spouse?
In my opinion, there’s no perfect spouse. If they appear to be perfect, they are probably good pretenders. During courtship, the real character should become clear. If unclear, court for longer. Be more observant. Ask relevant questions from family and friends, as well as your potential spouse. Get to know him or her better. It is better to get the foundation right than build a mansion on falsehood.
130. Does pregnancy guarantee marriage?
The simple answer is no. Some have pre-marital sex on the promise of marriage. In some cases, there has been disagreement and the man absconds. In some cases the woman becomes pregnant, but later miscarries. The above are true-to-life experiences. In my opinion it’s better to avoid pre-marital sex. In that way, you appreciate each other better and there will be greater blessings in the marriage.
Thank you very much for your time.
This is Jack Lookman signing off. Ire o (I wish you blessings)
Ire kabiti (I wish you loads of blessings).
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Thank you for your contributions: John Tosin Adekunle and Rita Nnamani
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