Thursday 19 September 2024

231 - 240 Marital Food For Thought - Jack’s Marriage Project - Jack Lookman - Empowerment and Inspiration - empowering & inspiring generations

 231. Should You Marry If You’re Poor?


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Being poor should probably not preclude you from marriage. However, you may need to take steps to be more resourceful. You may require training and effort. You may seek ways to increase your income. You may explore multiple income streams. You may seek affordable mentors to help your journey.

Society is probably richer, if you’re a responsible married man, than a promiscuous entity, who sleeps around with married or unmarried women. 


232. What Are Your Reasons For Marriage?




Is it because of riches? Because of love? Because of looks? Because others are getting married? Is it to have children? Is it because of sex? Is it for companionship? Is it for focus? Is it to share and care? Is it for religious or spiritual reasons? 

Are your reasons for marriage enduring? Or is it just about ticking the boxes?

The stronger, the foundational reasons, the greater the likelihood for success.



233. Is It Impossible For Your Marriage To Fail?




Sometimes, we think that if we cross all t’s and dot all i’s then our marriage becomes forever secure. The reality is that, sometimes, life happens. There could be financial difficulties; there could be be sexual attractions; there could be unresolved conflict; there could be health challenges; there could be infertility; there could be external pressures; there could be misfortune; there could be irreconcilable differences.

These are some reason why marriages could fail.

It may be more beneficial to be humble and prayerful for the best possible marital outcome.


234. If Your Husband Loses His Job


The reality of the job market, is insecurity and uncertainty. Artificial intelligence could start replacing humans, younger workers may be preferred to older ones; businesses may collapse; skills may become outdated; etc.

If your husband and breadwinner loses his job, what will you do?

Will you divorce him? Will you sell your body? Will you be rude to him? Will you work together to find a solution? Will you jointly explore multiple income streams? Will you forever nag him? Will your reaction be constructive or destructive? Will you have planned ahead, to avoid loss of income?

What will you do?



235. What Parent Avatar Will You Be?




Will you be caring? Will you spoil the children? Will you be firm and just? Will you be a disciplinarian? Will you be unduly harsh? Will you be soft? Will you be caring? Will you accommodate nonsense? Will you be over protective? Will you be intentional? Will you impart good character and behaviour? Will you be laid back? Will you always pass the buck? Will you be proactive? Will you be a combination of the above? Or even more?

Do you have the long or short term in mind? Could your actions or inactions, make or mar?





236. If Your Child Is A Genius





Families are rarely blessed with geniuses. And this could be any family. 

If you are blessed with a gifted child; will it be life continuing as normal? Will you protect him? Will you optimise his potential? Will you leverage support systems? Will you brag and become arrogant? Will you be humble and thankful? Will you nurture him to greatness? Will you be prayerful for the best possible outcomes? Will you be mindful of the company he keeps? Will you be mindful of his food and drink? Will you take necessary precautions, that he may attain greatness? Will you research best practice? Will you read relevant biographies? Will you make the best of God’s gift? Or will you squander opportunity? That which so many desire.





237. If You Have A Disabled Child



Some parents have disabled children. This isn’t always predictable. Some other children become disabled, due to one accident or the other.

As a parent, how will you manage such?

Will you abandon your family? Will you reassure your loved ones of your commitment? Will you pray for guidance, strength and the wherewithal? Will you explore best ways to manage the situation? Will you still be thankful, irrespective of the set back? Will you cry all day and night, asking why this has happened? Will you seek support as necessary? Will you embrace it as an opportunity of service? Will your daily reflection be deep? Will you reflect on the misfortunes of others? Will you get all family members to be supportive of each other?

What will you do?



238. Does The Sex Of Your Child Matter?


Are you one of those, who are insistent on a particular sex? Who will keep trying, until the possibility is actualised? 

Does it matter if you have a boy or girl? Doesn’t it matter more of the quality and values they possess?

Some of a particular sex, may be blessings for generations. Some of other sexes, may be items of ridicule.

Isn’t the personality more important than the sex? And this may be different, for each family unit.


239. If You Come From A Lineage Of Divorcees




If your parents and earlier generations have a history of divorce or separation, is there a chance that you may follow suit? Are you likely to divorce? Is it in the genes? Or is it hereditary? Is it a behavioural pattern that you’ve adopted? Is it a culmination of generational habits?

Should this be a consideration before you marry? Or is it just unnecessary noise?

Whatever be it, do your research and give it some thought. 





240. If Your Child Has Behavioural Issues 


Is your child a bully? Is he always involved in fights? Is he unduly argumentative? Is he intentionally destructive? Does he make a lot of noise? At school and at home? Is he the very one, whom everyone wishes to avoid?

If you know this as the problem, do you attempt to solve it? Do you seek help? Do you observe, and do nothing? And let the situation escalate? Do you become abusive? Physically and otherwise? Do you cry all day, in case that solves anything?

If you child has behavioural issues, how will you deal with it?



Thank you very much for your time. 


This is Jack Lookman signing off. Ire o (I wish you blessings)


Ire kabiti (I wish you loads of blessings).



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Thank you for your contributions: John Tosin Adekunle and  Rita Nnamani 


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