261. Does A Small Family Size Guarantee Riches?
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Will you intentionally have a small family? So that you could have and manage great resources? So that you spend less time on children, and have more wealth in your possession?
After all, more children may be proportional to more spending? And more children, will take up more of your time and resources?
Is life really a mathematical puzzle? Where things are always ideal?
What if you lost your income? Or if you became incapacitated? Or if the children, become your blessings in disguise?
Is the journey of life, more complex than you think? With so many unplanned twists and thorns along the way?
In my little understanding of life, 4+4 isn’t always 8.
The answer to life’s riddle could depend on various circumstances.
Some have small families and are not rich; Some have big families, and swim in wealth. Some others are between the extremes; nothing is wholly predictable except the destination of death.
262. Do You Have Any Business Being Married?
Is marriage meant for everyone? Does it bring joy to all? Does it sometimes bring misery? Do some journey it successfully? While others fail woefully? Does it require preparation? Does it suit all personalities? Does it tick your boxes? Or are you merely with the bandwagon?
Reflect on the institution of marriage. Give it thought and prayer. Before dabbling into a regretful or worthwhile journey.
263. If Your Spouse Misbehaves
How will you react if your spouse upsets you?
Will you make it known, to be avoided next time?
Will you nurse the pain, and quietly keep a grudge?
Will you retaliate? An eye for an eye?
Will you involve mediators? May be to find a way?
Will you broadcast the deed? For the whole world to hear?
Will you manage it, with wisdom and affection?
Will you over-react, just to make a point?
Or will you overlook it, letting it go by?
264. If You No Longer Love Your Spouse
If there are strains in your marriage; If the bond is no longer strong.
If you’ve tried your best; Just to make it work.
If you’ve involved mediators,
professionals and stakeholders.
If you’ve done all that you could; But that spark doesn’t re-appear.
What will you do? Will you file for divorce?
Will you separate? Will you have another lover?
Will you re-marry? Will you fornicate or commit adultery?
Will you become violent? Will you become an irritant?
Will you move out? Will you terminate your obligations?
Will you pray? Will you seek best practice?
Will you continue to be unhappy? In a none ending phase?
Will you mutually agree … To part for the common good?
Will you continue the marriage … Till death do you part?
Or will you re-marry; And keep your peace intact?
265. If Your Teenager Becomes Pregnant
Will you expel her from the home? Will you rebuke her? Will you make enquiries? Will you terminate her education? Will you support her? Will you disown her? Will you have nothing to do with her?
Will you counsel her? Will you embrace her actions? Will you terminate the pregnancy? Will you admonish her? Will you seek support? Will you proactively avoid such a situation? Will you learn from the experience? What will you do?
266. If Your Teenage Son Impregnates His Girlfriend
Will you take similar actions as above? Will you act differently?
267. Is Money An Important Metric In Marriage?
Will your marriage be blinded by love? Will it be about good looks? Could you maintain a marriage without money? Will you require money to pay bills? Will You require money to feed? Will you require money to maintain the family? Will you require money for school fees? Is money really important? Or will love find a way?
268. How Will You Manage Divorce Or Separation?
Will you become avowed enemies with your spouse? Will you cause pain and terror? Will you hurt the children? Will you carry out your responsibilities? Will you support the children spiritually? Will you have nothing to do with the children? Will you maintain relationships with in-laws? Will you be fair in your dealings?
269. Is it important to carefully choose your spouse?
Are your personalities compatible? Do you have similar backgrounds? Are other stakeholders in support? Do you have common visions? Are you both in it for the long term? Could you weather storms together? Will you be supportive of each other? Will you individually manage each other’s flaws? Are your thoughts and actions in resonance? Could you tolerate each other for a lifetime? Could you learn, from successes and failures of others?
These, and more, should you consider before tying the knots.
270. Will You Teach Your Children Your Native Language?
As your children grow up, with English being the predominant language; will you teach your children your native language? If you haven’t the time or space; will you invest in a suitable language coach? Will you teach them about your culture? Your ancestry and history?
Are these things of importance? Or not as important as may be. Will the river that forgets its source, dry up sooner or later? As important as English may be, could you ever truly be English?
Thank you very much for your time.
This is Jack Lookman signing off. Ire o (I wish you blessings)
Ire kabiti (I wish you loads of blessings).
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Thank you for your contributions: John Tosin Adekunle and Rita Nnamani
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